I'm worried about my own behaviour
Cover your tracks. Delete your online search history.
You may be worried about your own behaviour. If you think your actions have been (or are becoming) abusive or harmful to someone you care about, read on. There are services and support available to help you to address - and change - these behaviours.
Defining 'harm and unhealthy behaviours'
‘Harm’ does not just mean physical violence. It includes unhealthy behaviours such as:
- extreme feelings of jealousy
- difficulty controlling anger
- intimidation and making your partner scared or anxious
- emotional, financial or physical abuse
- screaming, shouting, punching and throwing objects
- criticising your partner and putting them down
Ask yourself: are you worried about your own behaviour towards someone you care about. Do these things happen?
- Are you hitting, kicking, or causing physical harm to someone: your partner, relative or carer?
- Do you frequently shout at them?
- Do you regularly criticise them or put them down?
- Do you control who they see?
- Do you control their finances?
It's normal to have disagreements and argue from time to time. But if you are intentionally causing harm to your partner or a member of your family, and your actions are motivated by extreme feelings of anger and jealousy, that’s not healthy. Confidential help is available.
Behaviour Change programmes
There are courses that's specifically designed to help behaviour change.
TLC: Talk, Listen, Change programme. This is designed to help people acknowledge and change harmful and unwanted behaviours. There are dedicated programmes for women, LGBTQIA individuals and young people. Self-referrals are accepted, as well as those from professionals. Integrated support is provided for victims of those who are seeking support with their behaviours.
Respect Phoneline. This is a confidential phone line, web chat and email service. It's designed for people using abusive behaviours in domestic relationships. The service is open to men and women, whether in heterosexual or same sex relationships. It's also for concerned friends or family members, and professionals.